Suppository Preaching

by Charles S. Garabedian

Ministers of the gospel engage in various types of preaching from the pulpit. These types include expository preaching, textual preaching, and topical preaching. Many Christian fundamentalist and conservative evangelical pastors favor expository preaching, which focuses on fully explaining to the pewsitters a verse or passage in the Bible. Over the past few years, I have noticed that all too often Christian fundamentalist and conservative evangelical pastors engage in another type of preaching we are defining right here—right now—for the first time in human history. We call it suppository preaching.

The word “suppository” is most often associated with the delivery of a prescription or nonprescription medication by the anal route in the form of a glycerin suppository. Suppository preaching occurs when a Christian fundamentalist or conservative evangelical pastor behaves like an asshole in the pulpit while delivering a sermon. Here is my all-time-favorite example of suppository preaching, along with some wise and entertaining commentary from three members of the small atheist community known as the The Young Turks. Why do so many atheists see right through this malarkey while supposedly discerning fundie Christians sit right through such garbage and fail to detect that something is sorely amiss?  Beats me!!!  Please take a look at this:

Young Turks Video Clip

Jack Schaap News Clip

Fundie preachers do way too much suppository preaching. Sermons that demean girls and women—purporting to put them in their proper submissive place in the home and in American society—are examples of suppository preaching. Another form of suppository preaching is any sermon that calls for public discrimination and persecution against LGBTQ Americans—and especially those sermons that call for executing such people.

Suppository preaching occurs when a fundie pastor stands in his pulpit and declares that all women who had to make difficult pregnancy decisions are guilty of murder. Suppository preaching occurs when fundie pastors get angry in their pulpits and start pointing their fingers at specific members of the congregation they intensely dislike—and then do a tell-all session about their various sins and failures in life to reduce them to emotional ashes in front of their fellow pewsitters.

Suppository preaching occurs when a fundie preacher stands in the pulpit and rails at the members of his congregation about how stupid they are because they are not as educated as he is and cannot remember the content of his sermons (Been there.  Seen that.)

I bet you could come up with numerous other examples of suppository preaching. To the best of my recollection, I have never seen a Roman Catholic priest or any other Mainline Christian pastor doing suppository preaching—either in person or on my television set. It appears to me that suppository preaching is a unique, unsavory characteristic of Fundieland. If you ever seen any preaching of this nature out on the vast American landscape, you now have the perfect term to classify it under—suppository preaching.

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